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2020: Happy New Year!

Photo by Jude Beck on Unsplash

Happy New Year to you all and my wishes for a wonderful 2020. We made it through 2019. As you think about the upcoming year and what you hope it brings, I’d like to tell you my own hope for you. My hope for each of you is that you will be a little kinder to yourselves. My people will tell you that I’m often reminding them, “Be kind to yourself.” That’s because this world is tough enough on all of us. We don’t need to add to that by being our own worst critics, and yet most of us do just that. Being kind to ourselves doesn’t mean we make excuses about everything and we no longer have accountability. It simply means recognizing that things can be difficult, that when we make mistakes it isn’t the end of the world. It means saying to ourselves, “Okay, that wasn’t what I’d hoped for or intended. Let me try again.” I’ve shared this before in this blog, but one thing I started doing which made a huge difference for me was reframing my screw ups and ADHD moments as “human moments.” When I locked myself out of my office just as a new client arrived, that was definitely a human moment. There are other kinds of human moments, too: times when we are lonely, sad, scared, or angry. Just remembering that how we are feeling is part of being human can reconnect us and help lessen feelings of isolation. And all of that is being kinder to yourself. The world is happy to criticize you and tell you all the ways you have failed or not excelled. You deserve better than to join them in beating yourself up. You can be realistic, hold yourself to standards, and still be kind to yourself. And, if you are, the research says that you can expect to do better because you won’t be as afraid of taking risks or of failing. You can be kinder, have a better quality of life, and have the last laugh. I think that’s a great goal for 2020 and it’s my hope for you this coming year.

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